Fighting Fear With A BB Gun

Source: Wikimedia Commons

The night before last I remembered part of my last dream, but it is unclear so I will have to try to put the pieces together the best I can.

I am not sure but I think that I was not myself and I think I may have been a woman, maybe, I remember being outside my grandfather’s house talking with two or three women; they were three women that I knew from CS like Mrs. C, Mrs. JN, and Mrs. E.

Things are unclear but I think a man who looked somewhat like Tommy Gunn from Rocky V (Rocky 5) came up to us and threatened us, took us hostage, and stole our car with us in it as prisoners.

I remember wanting to do something but being afraid since I think I was a small & weak woman. (I am not saying that women are weak, I am saying that in this dream I was a weak woman or at least I think I was a woman, I am not sure)

Instead of fighting him we followed his commands and got into our car, he drove as we all sat there in silence, and I was sitting in the back seat behind him.

We were afraid, confused, etc. and I was trying to figure out how to handle the situation.

I did not want to get the others killed or hurt and I felt that I was not strong enough to handle the situation, so I did not know what to do, and I sat there doing a lot of thinking.

At some point I noticed that I had a green and black pistol in my pocket but I was still afraid and confused about what to do, but I told myself that it was time to stop letting fear cloud my judgment (actually it was deeper than that but I do not know how to explain it); so I took a deep breath, let the fear pass, and decided to take action.

I pulled out my pistol pointed it at the man’s head and told him to stop the car or I was would end his life now; I noticed that even though the pistol looked real, it was actually a BB gun, I noticed this because of the size of the barrel.

I was bluffing and hoping that the man would think that it was a real pistol, he did not seem to think that I would shoot him and that it was loaded, so I pulled down the clip and I looked at it pretending that I saw bullets when I actually only saw BBs; I then put the clip back in and told him that I would not hesitate to shoot him if he did not stop the car and get out.

I said it seriously with a straight face and told him that I had practiced shooting pistols before, and that shooting him would not be hard for me.

He believed me, stopped the car, and got out of the car; I got out as well still pointing the pistol at him as I got into the driver’s seat, and then I drove off.

The other women in the car started to sigh in relief and thank me, and Mrs. C apologized for calling me weak and saying that I was led by fear or something like that; I can not remember what that was all about, but I think before the man had taken us hostage, I think the women had talked with me about some of my problems in life.

One of the women asked how did I get the courage to handle the situation the way that I did, I told her that I had been afraid & confused, but I was tired of letting fear confuse and rule my life, and something changed in that instant; I let the fear pass, took a deep breath, and did what I thought was necessary to handle the situation.

I told her that when I was thinking about how fear effected my normal life more than about how it was effecting me in our hostage situation, and that is when I got tired of the fear and just faced it and let it pass through me.

She told me that I was brave, but I told her that I was not sure about that but I hoped that I will be able to deal with the fear & the confusion that it can cause in the future, in my normal everyday life; that is the real challenge, but at least I could then see there is hope, but I woke up.

The end,
-John Jr 🙂